Confused and Frustrated

I must preface this ranting post with the fact that until this Saturday I was feeling AMAZING! I was telling the world how great I’ve been feeling. How my new gluten-free lifestyle has changed my world. How symptoms that I had no idea were even symptoms were suddenly gone! I was feeling more energetic, and not crashing as severely as I used to. I wasn’t sweating excessively for no reason anymore. I was less bloated, and less achy, and overall feeling healthier. I was working out again (well, I was up to 20 minutes of yoga and feeling stronger doing it). And I wasn’t writing blog posts about it because I finally felt well enough to be up off the couch.

I keep saying WAS because something got me. And I have NO IDEA what. And the worst part is, it was in my own home, by my own hands.

On Friday after work we went out for drinks with a few co-workers so we didn’t get home until 7:30. By then I was already starving so my original plans went out the window and I was happy that I had a box of gluten-free chicken strips in the freezer from M&Ms. My husband wanted spring rolls too so, on a separate pan, served with separate tongs, they went into the same oven. Rice and veggies went into the microwave and we were 20 minutes away from dinner.

This is the only place I can imagine some type of cross-contamination happened. Was it the items being in the same oven? Did the oil from the spring rolls splash on the chicken? Did some of the crumbs that fell on the counter make it into my rice?

All I know is I woke up at 4 am running to the bathroom and 3 days later I am still sick. All the symptoms of a good ‘gluten-ing’ – diarrhea, fatigue, stomach cramping, nausea, and a strange combination of diarrhea & constipation at the same time. Ya – explain that one!?!

Sorry. TMI. But as popular as the recipes on this blog are, this blog was meant to talk celiac disease. And life with celiac disease – and, well folks, this is my life with celiac disease.

There isn’t anything that seems to help the symptoms, so I curl up and pout and try to sleep it off. Oh, there’s another symptom – depression. A bit more than just a case of the “woah-is-me’s”. I know full well there is a lot worse than a little tummy ache, and I should be lucky this is all that is wrong with me, and that all I have to do is eat different. Wah, wah. First world problems.

BUT – I’m frustrated as shit I possibly can be. How did I get sick in my own house? By my own hands? If it is as “simple” as eating gluten-free, why is this so hard? How do I keep getting accidentally glutened?  Or am I actually allergic to something else too? I still don’t eat dairy, and even went so far as to buy vegan becel so that I’ll stop using butter and therefore be completely dairy free. Are the M&Ms products maybe not so gluten free? I have a hard time pointing my finger at certain products or places because I am still figuring out what I do and don’t react to. I’ve tried things again once I am sure they are gluten-free, things I blamed in the past for making me sick, and they are fine now. So I don’t want to go brand-shaming when I can’t truly know if that is what made me sick.

I hesitate to start cutting out more from my diet, but perhaps that is the next step. At the same time, before this weekend I was doing/feeling great and wouldn’t have thought I needed to cut anything out. I was even considering trying dairy again – that’s how good I felt.

But now I’m back to square one. My gut is aching, and as much as I know I need to eat, I’m becoming more and more afraid of food. Do I go completely grain free? What about nuts? Corn? And legumes? I’ve heard those can be culprits too. Fruit, vegetables and meat…. but meat can be bad too… Not leaving much left now.

Not sure where to go from here. For now, back to bed I guess.


3 responses to “Confused and Frustrated

  1. I would cut out all nuts for a while and then add them back one by one to make sure they aren’t the culprit. I found out I was having a reaction to peanuts. I had no idea I had a problem with them. I’m not allergic but they irritate my gut something awful!! I can eat pecans and almonds no problem, but not peanuts?!?!?

    • No! Not nuts?! 😉 Thanks for the tip. I’m willing to try anything at this point. I have also read a lot about celiacs and corn sensitivity and I have been consuming a lot more corn products since going gluten-free so that was going to be the first thing out. Nut-filled granola bars have also been a go-to for me, but as convenient as they are, I’ll cut those out for a bit too. Thanks again for sharing your experience with me!

      • No problem. Just try one nut at a time if you don’t want to cut them all out. More than likely once you cut the right one, you’ll start feeling better! I’d start with peanuts! 🙂

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